Junkiness - For Addicts of News, Gossip and Heroin

In Memoriam

August 1st, 2009

Here lies Junkiness
May 2006 – July 2007

BREAKING: Weird Al Yankovic Pied Today

June 25th, 2009


Powell Endorsement Blows McCain Campaign

October 21st, 2008


Probst Hosts TV’s Bucket List

October 20th, 2008

the-bucket-list.jpgFrom EW.com:

Survivor’s Jeff Probst has created — and will host — a new reality pilot for CBS… The show, Live Like You’re Dying, will feature a person who has been given a terminal diagnosis with a finite amount of time to live and “take them on the last adventure of their life,” according to Probst.

“It could be playing guitar with Eric Clapton or jumping out of a plane into a volcano,” Probst explained to EW.com. “Whatever it is that you’re still desiring to do in your life — we want to make it happen.”

Viewers hope that at least one person will live the adventure of canceling Survivor.

[via Videogum]

Howell Endorsement Cinches Obama Win

October 20th, 2008


A surprise twist in an already surprising election, millionaire Thurston Howell, III, has publicly announced his support for Democratic candidate, Barack Obama.

A resident of Newport, Rhode Island and a Harvard graduate, Howell’s support of Obama’s campaign comes as a lethal blow to the McCain camp.

A McCain representative seemed unphased, stating, “It’s probably just because he’s black.”

Sarah Palin’s Speeches Getting Out of Hand

October 17th, 2008

Keith Angry!

October 16th, 2008

MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann takes McCain to school re: his hurt feelings over campaign mudslinging.

Olbermann makes Sam Kinison look like Steven Wright.

[Clip via WLAMTA]

McCain Mimes How Nancy Reagan Broke Her Pelvis

October 16th, 2008


“Stella ain’t the only one who got her groove back!”

[pic via Farts, etc.]

McCain: As President I Will Start All Speeches With “Get Well Soon”

October 16th, 2008

In last night’s Presidential debate against That One, McCain started off with a trademarked hospital-shout-out — this time to former First Lady Nancy Reagan, who is apparently healing her broken pelvis.

The Maverick just can’t help himself – he has a lot of friends in the hospital. I guess he’s just at that age.

Meanwhile, in the race for Plumberdent, a rising star took center stage.

Where Does He Get Those Wonderful Toys?

July 28th, 2008

your boyfriend

His lanyard says, “I’m Batman.”

[Bat tips via Fishboy]

Levi McNayNay

July 9th, 2008

Our favorite L-I-V-I-N actor and his girlfriend welcomed a baby boy, Levi Alves McNayNay, into the world on Monday night.

Sources claim Levi was born fully clothed, prompting Daddy Matt to ask for a paternity test.

Grease is the Word

June 23rd, 2008


Hayden Panettiere has a secret crush on:

  • (a) Danny Zuko
  • (b) Fonzie
  • (c) Squiggy

If you answered (d) Sonny, Putzie and Doody, you were right, and also born to hand jive.

Jeff Garlin Dead at 71

June 23rd, 2008

Right out of the gate we’re going with the ol’ dead-person-switcheroo…

Since our last post we’ve privately mourned the passing of Kurt Russell, Kevin Pollack and Harvey Birdman.

There Will Be Blog

June 23rd, 2008

So we tried posting on Junkiness for a year. Then we tried not posting on Junkiness for a year. Turns out, we missed it.

The Junkiness within cannot contain itself. We’re not saying it’ll be updated every day, but Junkiness will live on.

So fire up your browsers and get your eyes and asses to Jnay as often as possible.

Thank you,
The Jnay team.

We’re Not Ignoring You

August 1st, 2007

We’re just not here anymore. Junkiness, like so many Aaron Sorkin dramas, has been canceled.

We have our reasons. More importantly, we have lots more free time now. Subsequently, look for the Junkiness book this fall. Contact us to be added to our “Junkiness updates” email list.

Thanks for hanging out.
The Junkiness Staff

P.S. – Did we mention we’ve got a blog for sale? $75,000 OBO.

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