Taxis of Evil
Thursday, August 31st, 2006
Sen. Conrad Burns of Montana (recently in the news due to his fond yammering about the “little Guatemalan man” who works on his plantation) raised several more hackles during his remarks at a fundraiser, when he suggested that terrorist sleeper cells were lurking in our nation’s taxis:
At the campaign event with [Laura] Bush, Burns talked about the war on terrorism, saying a “faceless enemy” of terrorists “drive taxi cabs in the daytime and kill at night.” … The campaign said Thursday that the senator was simply pointing out terrorists can be anywhere.
When asked to clarify “anywhere,” Burns provided the following examples of other places terrorists might be hiding:
- Behind convenience store counters
- At any restaurant sellin’ that weird pita bread shit
- In San Francisco coffeehouses
- In the trunk of Al Gore’s hybrid
- At the United Nations
- Beneath Cindy Sheehan’s clever disguise
- Outer BinLadinia
- With the wild Injuns
- On “The Daily Show”
- Anywhere with “-istan” in the name
- In that Hilton trollop’s ladyparts
- In “Darkietown” or whatever they call it nowadays
When prodded to offer locations where it would not be worth looking for terrorists, Burns suggested:
