All Bow Before Paris Hilton, Queen of the Celebriwhores
Celebrities
do a lot of weird batshit stuff. It’s what makes the world go ’round. But Paris Hilton has made an art-form out of being jaw-droppingly insanetarded. And as of today, she is that art-form’s Leonardo da-fucking-Vinci:
“Paris Hilton has bought the plot next to Marilyn Monroe’s grave to bury her pet goat. The 25-year-old has reportedly booked a plot in Hollywood’s Pierce Bros Westwood Village Memorial Park next to her screen idol. It is also alleged that she has booked a gospel choir to perform at a private funeral at Los Angeles’ International Church of Christ.”
There you go, celebriwhores. The gauntlet has been thrown down. Paris has set the bar at a level that seems insurmountable, but there are a few things that could possibly top it:
- Lindsay Lohan eating Elton John’s hair-plugs and then pooping them on a puppy with cancer.
- David Hasselhoff humping eight pandas on Pay-Per-View and donating the proceeds to eradicate soup.
- Nicole Richie eating a sandwich.
This entry was posted
on Friday, August 11th, 2006 at 10:31 am and is filed under Celebriwhores, Idiots, Nonsense.
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August 18th, 2006 17:12
[...] Britney Spears sees Paris Hilton’s crazy and raises her a bonkers. Television helps children feel less pain. Thank god, because hugging and comforting them can get real boring. [...]