Balling on the Ceiling
All votes are in. The polling booths are closed. A winner has been decided. By unanimous decision, Lionel Richie has been named the Greatest Porn Star in the World, by a 1 to 0 vote. Turns out Richie himself cast the deciding vote in his favor.
“I am a legend in my own mind, the greatest porn star I know. You can’t be a love songwriter and not be the greatest porn star.”
I know just what he means. I try to write humor for a living, and I’m hilarious in bed.
In related news: Lionel’s daughter Nicole was just narrowly edged out as the Skankiest Whore in the World by a good friend of hers.





