You May Never Get Laid Again
I tried to warn you, but you wouldn’t listen to me. Everyone thought it was a good idea to tell kids not to have sex. And now the federal government is targeting that same message at unmarried adults up to age 29 as part of its abstinence-only programs. By the year 2010, you’ll be on Social Security by the time you get to bone a chick. Except by then, it’ll be called “Financial Freedom” and you won’t even be able to afford a condom, which will be illegal anyway.
“They’ve stepped over the line of common sense,” said James Wagoner, president of Advocates for Youth, a Washington, D.C.-based non-profit that supports sex education. “To be preaching abstinence when 90% of people are having sex is in essence to lose touch with reality. It’s an ideological campaign. It has nothing to do with public health.”
But Wade Horn, assistant secretary for children and families at the Department of Health and Human Services, said the revision is aimed at 19- to 29-year-olds because more unmarried women in that age group are having children.
“The message is ‘It’s better to wait until you’re married to bear or father children,’ ” Horn said. “The only 100% effective way of getting there is abstinence.”
“It’s true,” replied one concerned citizen. “Only a combination of information, affordable birth control, and legalized abortion can top abstinence as the most effective method of reducing unwanted pregnancies. But where the Hell are we gonna get that?”
When criticized that abstinence programs give no instruction on birth control or safe sex, President Bush replied, “Well, I had to do something. I’ve got to keep those pages out of the reach of Congress.”
Link via Franky Pelvis
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October 31st, 2006 17:30
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June 4th, 2007 23:24
Unfortunately, its not a problem for me