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Just When We’d Forgotten Their Number

After decades of nobody caring, the true and tragic and magic story of the forgotten pop duo Milli Vanilli is coming to the big screen.

Hollywood trade paper Daily Variety reported in its Thursday issue that Universal Pictures is developing a film about the lip-synching combo, who lost their coveted Grammy for best new artist in 1990 when it emerged that they had never sung on their records.

The project will be written and directed for the General Electric Co.-controlled studio by Jeff Nathanson, who previously wrote the Leonardo DiCaprio crime caper “Catch Me If You Can.” He has secured the cooperation of Milli Vanilli alumnus Fabrice Morvan, who has been pursuing a comeback for years, as well as the estate of his colleague, Rob Pilatus, who died of a drug overdose in 1998.

Someone please make sure Jeff Nathanson’s tombstone lists, “secured the cooperation of Milli Vanilli in generating those media whores a little more time in the spotlight” as his greatest accomplishment. Because, isn’t it?

I hope it turns out that instead of an actual movie this is a complex plot to lure idiots to movie theaters and steal their wallets. Like there’ll be a sign saying “Milli Vanilli tickets only” and an arrow pointing to a special door and behind that door is an 8th grade bully who will punch you in the gut, pull down your pants and shove you into an alley. Because that’s what you deserve.

2 Responses to “Just When We’d Forgotten Their Number”

  1. Ian
    February 15th, 2007 19:48

    I’m hoping for Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson in blackface, with Eddie Murphy as the obese white woman whose affections they share.

  2. John
    February 22nd, 2007 14:53

    A problem which you discuss is very important for me. Thank you for your resume.

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