From EW.com:

Survivor’s Jeff Probst has created — and will host — a new reality pilot for CBS… The show, Live Like You’re Dying, will feature a person who has been given a terminal diagnosis with a finite amount of time to live and “take them on the last adventure of their life,” according to Probst.

“It could be playing guitar with Eric Clapton or jumping out of a plane into a volcano,” Probst explained to EW.com. “Whatever it is that you’re still desiring to do in your life — we want to make it happen.”

Viewers hope that at least one person will live the adventure of canceling Survivor.

[via Videogum]

Right out of the gate we’re going with the ol’ dead-person-switcheroo…

Since our last post we’ve privately mourned the passing of Kurt Russell, Kevin Pollack and Harvey Birdman.

The fashion mogul and chronic nag is dead at 78. No word yet on whether Leroy will attend the service.

British comedian Bob Monkhouse recently starred in a television spot promoting the fight against prostate cancer. The advertisers had a tough challenge in casting Monkhouse, as he’s been dead for four years.

Ad-makers blended archive footage of Monkhouse with shots of a body-double in a graveyard for the Prostate Cancer Research Foundation’s “Give a few Bob” campaign.

The script, spoken by a sound-alike, warns in typical Monkhouse one-liner style… “Let’s face it — as a comedian, I died many deaths. Prostate cancer, I don’t recommend.”

This comes as fantastic news for Stephen Dorff whose dead career is now planning a PSA warning against the dangers of “fatal douchebaggery.”

In addition, Columbia Pictures will be producing a series of advertisements for the DVD release of Leonard Part VI starring “Ghost Dad.”

Reuters (in taking a break from the tediousness of current events) reported today these five facts about Dr. Jack Kevorkian.

Here are some facts they forgot to mention:

The indie favorite and openly gay game show guest soon to be “blank”-ing up the daisies.

How do you like it? How do you like it?

Let’s hope the former star of Prison Break learned some valuable information about bustin’ out of jail; Looks like Lane “Wrong Lane” Garrison is on his way to the big house.

[Garrison] pleaded guilty Monday to a felony count of vehicular manslaughter and other alcohol-related charges stemming from the December car crash that killed 17-year-old Beverly Hills High School student Vahagn Setian and injured two 15-year-old girls.

He is scheduled to be sentenced Aug. 2 and could face a maximum of six years and eight months behind bars.

This comes as wonderful news to 24‘s Keifer Sutherland who hopes that in light of this trend, it is only a matter of time before he is legally allowed to cut someone’s head off.

… And with so much love left to give.

Alternate, meaner titles for this post:

• Falwell Blames Death on Abortions, Gays, Liberal Hollywood
• Q: What Lies in a Box and Hates Gays? A: Jerry Falwell
• Falwell About to Find Out that Heaven is a Lot Hotter than He Thought
• Falwell Horrified to Discover that Light at End of Tunnel is Gay Disco Party
• Falwell Waits in Purgatory While God Crafts Eternal Butt Plug
• Gay God Gets Ready to Hit the Showers with Falwell
• Falwell Gets Shocker at Pearly Gates: 9/11 Was His Fault
• Guess Who’s Not Getting Invited To Oscar Wilde and Truman Capote’s KY Afterlife Party?
• Falwell Dead; Nation’s Gays Mourn Passing by Entering Glory-Holes At “Half-Shaft”
• How The Mighty Have Falwellen

The handsome, muscle-bound Tarzan actor/lead singer of AC/DC passed away at the age of 80 yesterday in Baltimore.

On a totally inner-circle Junkiness side note: In your fucking face, Wayne Gladstone!

The Newhart star and poor man’s Sanka was 85.

Jack Valenti: May be inappropriate for children and other living people.

Finally, Jim Morrison can go back to Florida.

Can twenty or so Celine Dion fans be wrong?

Angelina Jolie, always with the orphans.

Goddamnit! Here comes the end of the world.

A U.S. sergeant serving in Afghanistan created a stir this morning when he wrote an article critical of the fact that flags in the States were lowered to half-staff to honor the Virginia Tech shooting victims, but not for American soldiers killed in action:

Sgt. Jim Wilt lamented that his comrades’ deaths have become a mere blip on the TV screen, lacking the “shock factor” to be honored by the Stars and Stripes as the deaths at Virginia Tech were. “I find it ironic that the flags were flown at half-staff for the young men and women who were killed at VT, yet it is never lowered for the death of a U.S. service member,” Wilt wrote.

In order to further investigate this complicated issue, our Junkiness-on-the-Street reporters asked four ordinary Americans for their opinions about Wilt’s criticism. This is what they had to say:

• “We must never forget the brave Americans who gave their lives on that fateful day of 9/11 when they were gunned down by that Korean kid and Saddam Hussein. Go Hokies!” –BobbyJo Hogswallop, Waco, TX
• “You gun-control pussies just don’t get it. If everyone on that army base had a gun, that soldier would have been taken down long before making his tragic comments.” –Charleton Nugent, Cheyenne, WY
• “The blame for this unfortunate situation lay squarely at the feet of those irresponsible ‘gangsta rappers’ and their shameless glorification of expressing one’s opinions.” –Rev. Thelonious Jackson, Chicago, IL
• “Well, anyone who says anything against the VT victims is un-American and a coward, but then anyone who disagrees with a U.S. soldier is a troop-hating traitor. So if you’ll excuse me, I need to go lynch myself.” –Joe Hodsack, Topeka, KS

The former Russian leader was 76-years-young.